The two biggest turning points in my life happened when I unfollowed everyone on social media and started from zero.
Algorithms program us. The creators we follow influence us. The energy of their content rubs off on us. We become invested in other people's lives more than our own. If we aren't mindful, old friends' reposts and stories suddenly become our interests. This is how I accidentally go from being incredibly focused on my creations to falling down an NFL football rabbit hole for hours — even though when I’m traveling or off social media, I realize I don’t care about it much at all.
When we spend years following the same people and constantly consuming other people's thoughts and interests, we lose our center. We consume more information not because we are genuinely curious about these things, but because we're being spoon-fed information designed to keep us hooked. We lose our connection to our intrinsic curiosity. We lose our authentic interests. We forget who we really are.
But what would happen if you started from a clean slate? What would happen if you unfollowed everyone and built back up from zero, as an experiment? How would your algorithm, social circle, and interests change? I’ll tell you from experience, the impact can be quite profound.
The first time I did this, I was 20 years old in college. At the time, I was scrolling way too much TikTok, spending too much time on Snapchat, and watching dumbass basketball YouTubers for hours a day. I had no purpose or direction. I had nothing to aim at. I had no mission to devote myself to. I was just floating. I wanted to be entertained, not inspired. This lack of direction also manifested in many other bad habits and addictions, in addition to social media addiction.
One day, I decided I'd had enough. I unfollowed everyone. I unsubscribed from every low-IQ YouTube channel. I deleted TikTok, IG, and Snapchat from my phone. I only kept YouTube, Spotify, and Audible for learning and personal growth. What happened over the next few months changed my life forever.
Now I had no algorithm feeding me information. I instead began to seek it out on my own. I started looking up (instead of only passively receiving) podcasts about neuroscience, psychology, and philosophy. I began to research obsessively about health, nutrition, running, lifting, and energy.
For months, I only consumed the thoughts of Jordan Peterson, Andrew Huberman, David Goggins, Jocko Willink, Nick Bare, Cam Hanes, and an array of Stoic philosophers. This began to program my mind and rewire my brain chemistry in the direction of those people.
Human beings are mimetic creatures. This means we become who we surround ourselves with. If you surround yourself with bums, you will be a bum. If you surround yourself with saints, you will become a saint.
During this stretch, I was only surrounding myself with some of the best minds in the world. It began to change me in significant ways. My brain was literally being rewired. I began meditating, journaling, running, walking, eating well, sleeping well, and studying hard in school. My new actions ingrained the new connections into my subconscious. I was still smoking weed and engaging in some other bad habits, but hey, I was 20.
I was on the path, taking the initial steps to become like the men I was surrounding myself with through the internet. It also probably helped that I didn’t really have any friends at the time - LOL.
(This is the valley of self-improvement, where you have outgrown your old life, but not fully stepped into the frequency where you attract your new friends. I’ll make a video about this on my YouTube soon).
This slight shift in my trajectory, based on a few months of intentional self-programming, led me to the initial steps that led to a new life path that was previously unimaginable.
Before I began researching and learning based on my own curiosity, I was completely certain I was going to be an investment banker or consultant and graduate with an economics degree. As I started to tune out from the noise of the world, I started to tune in to the desires of my heart and spirit.
I switched my major to psychology. I skipped another finance internship to backpack Europe. The journaling I was doing for fun prompted me to start this newsletter. The deep conversations I was listening to on podcasts inspired me to start my own. The entrepreneurial success of creators I was listening to inspired me to start my own business. A few years later, while all my friends have gone the corporate path (and no shame at all to them, many of them are crushing it and loving it - it just wasn’t for me), I have become a full-time writer, creator, speaker, entrepreneur, retreat host, and coach. And the seed was planted the day I decided to start from zero.
I did this again last December. I unfollowed literally every single person on every social media platform. This time, I had more direction going into the decision and wanted to amplify my focus.
I slowly began following people again, very intentionally. But in those few months of going back to zero, I made a lot of progress. I hosted my first retreat by myself, launched two cohorts, and crushed it in college football. I don’t know if I would have had the focus to do so had I not started from zero.
Now, I'm becoming a bit more loose and flexible again with who I'm following. But it's because I'm using social media less and less, paradoxically.
I believe my life is better now that I am connected back with more people on social media. It's more fun. It feels like community and connection, which is really the entire point of social media. But I am also keeping a close eye on how other people and their interests begin to program my own. To be honest, I am so immersed in my own life and my own mission and the people I serve that I don't have much time or desire to look at other people's stories or posts. I like to check in on my friends, but the days of mindlessly scrolling are over. When you have a strong enough mission, you naturally develop blinders for what's irrelevant.
So here’s is the takeaway from this letter:
Social media is programming you. Realize it and accept it. Your friends' interests become your interests. When you stay in the same algorithm and social network for years, you lose your authentic curiosity and unique frequency. But when you tune out for a period of time, you tune back into who you truly are.
When everyone around you is interested in the same things, watching the same content, and sharing the same posts to their stories, and you’re completely immersed in that world, how are you supposed to become your authentic self? How are you supposed to find out who you really are? How could you ever discover a life path and trajectory that’s different than those around you?
This is not to say social media is bad. Like any tool, it’s neutral until used. But it is often abused by our monkey minds for pleasure and stimulation. Taking a break and coming back into yourself might be exactly what your mind, heart, and spirit need to reclaim your sovereignty and discover who you really are.
A month off of social media will not kill you. You will survive. And on the other side, you might just find out who you really are and what you're meant to do in this lifetime. If you've never taken a break, and you've been contemplating it, let this be your permission and inspiration to do so.
If you like this newsletter, share it with a friend.
If you really want to reclaim your attention, unsubscribe from this newsletter - haha.
Whether you are going to take a break from social media now, in the future, or not at all, always remember that the truth of who you are is to be discovered away from the influence of others, in the solitude of your own mind and heart, and by pursuing your own intrinsic curiosity.
Thank you for your attention, and have a great day,
Jack
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If you wish to continue reading, here is my latest article:
totally, we absorb our surroundings so we need to choose them with intention
Love the idea of unfollowing everyone and starting from zero! It’s brilliant.
I was also using Instagram a lot, so I deactivated it a few months ago mainly because I can’t afford to lose my time to it at the moment. But the benefits have been so dramatic now I’m not sure I will be able to go back lol (maybe due to online marketing in the future I will)